If I stood here screaming your name at the top of my lungs
Would you hear me?
Would you care that I missed you?
Would you come to my rescue?
Would you know how much you hurt me and why I can never trust you?
How much longer do you remember of a time long ago, when you cared for me and I was too foolish to know
Would you remember who I am?
Would you know how to heal me?
Would you see into my eyes, into a truth that lies beneath?
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Love ramblings
My mind runs miles re-thinking past loves. Those loves “in the moment” “loves for a lifetime” and “love for the one.” I re create my past decisions wondering if it could have gone any other way, if there was something I should have, could have done to change something I once knew. The feelings were real within those moments I shared. But were they real enough to last forever, to build a tomorrow on? Well, I guess not. Because if they were, wouldn’t they be here with me? Or shouldn’t they be here no matter what I did, thought I did, wouldn’t they fight? I wait, I wait for that feeling to last longer. For me to never feel the need to let go? Why is something so simple so hard? Maybe that’s it, maybe I have never known an equal love. Maybe my past is filled with unbalanced giving and taking. Taking more of me as each new “love” comes my way until there is no more me. I’m lost.
Over – with – you
You pull my emotions
Play my weaknesses
And yet I still stand there, when you call.
Our story played it self out a long time ago
Feelings crumbled and vanished forever
I’ve banished you from me but can still hear you knocking on my door
So please go away, stop that racket
And learn to live without my strength
Without me waiting there to catch you when you fall so deep down you barely recognize yourself
You can make it on your own you
Don’t need me
I’m not a security blanket for you to hold
I just can’t invest any of me into you
My heart lies with someone else much more worthy than you
Someone I care about much more than what my head will let me think
Play my weaknesses
And yet I still stand there, when you call.
Our story played it self out a long time ago
Feelings crumbled and vanished forever
I’ve banished you from me but can still hear you knocking on my door
So please go away, stop that racket
And learn to live without my strength
Without me waiting there to catch you when you fall so deep down you barely recognize yourself
You can make it on your own you
Don’t need me
I’m not a security blanket for you to hold
I just can’t invest any of me into you
My heart lies with someone else much more worthy than you
Someone I care about much more than what my head will let me think
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Where’s the emergency exit?
Testing, testing 1,2,3…
Here we come reminding you of where you’ve been
A flash of light, a glimmer you catch
Putting pressure on cracks once healed
Reliving those moments of desire, rethinking choices and paths chosen
In the face of pain, not to repeat
Emotions that had no foundation
Hope remains something unseen, hearing the words but needing proof
Was it here or there or somewhere between?
Was it true or a trance of perfect?
That only lives in the young hearts untouched by wicked
It’s a balancing act of survival you see
Meet on need but not the other
Time to trip and fall, with no sharp landings.
Here we come reminding you of where you’ve been
A flash of light, a glimmer you catch
Putting pressure on cracks once healed
Reliving those moments of desire, rethinking choices and paths chosen
In the face of pain, not to repeat
Emotions that had no foundation
Hope remains something unseen, hearing the words but needing proof
Was it here or there or somewhere between?
Was it true or a trance of perfect?
That only lives in the young hearts untouched by wicked
It’s a balancing act of survival you see
Meet on need but not the other
Time to trip and fall, with no sharp landings.
Timid Control
Delusioned boy acting out lies of insecurities
Wants the best of two worlds
Barely living in one, while keeping a firm grasp on the other. She’s not allowed to leave
You could be happy living in one world
Along side one with no balancing act between your thoughts
Yet your indecision remains in each step you make keeping the fog pulled over your eyes.
Wants the best of two worlds
Barely living in one, while keeping a firm grasp on the other. She’s not allowed to leave
You could be happy living in one world
Along side one with no balancing act between your thoughts
Yet your indecision remains in each step you make keeping the fog pulled over your eyes.
When judgment crosses
The truths been told
Laid out clearly to see
Relief has come for brief moments of peace
Curious confusions put to fact
What was there all along
Confirmed
Yet stress and panic crash down once more
As I live here with you, in the shades of gray
I can’t explain it I just know its you
But not willing to admit it, I live in rhymes waiting for your move
You know its here as you ignore our passion
In a stage you haven’t worked through, not ready to move forward
Time will come I’m sure
You’ll see
When final decisions live eternally from our connection
No where to turn I stare blankly in front of me
Seeing nothing but haze.
Laid out clearly to see
Relief has come for brief moments of peace
Curious confusions put to fact
What was there all along
Confirmed
Yet stress and panic crash down once more
As I live here with you, in the shades of gray
I can’t explain it I just know its you
But not willing to admit it, I live in rhymes waiting for your move
You know its here as you ignore our passion
In a stage you haven’t worked through, not ready to move forward
Time will come I’m sure
You’ll see
When final decisions live eternally from our connection
No where to turn I stare blankly in front of me
Seeing nothing but haze.
Ridged Solution
A fairy tale façade chips away as piece-by-piece reality takes stage.
I crumble inside holding together the parts of me force apart and heading in different directions.
Inspirations left me falling into something so liquid
Giving up the things I love
I’ve lost a part of me from there to here
Completing a circle I find myself where I once was before.
Torn between him and a dream of you.
I crumble inside holding together the parts of me force apart and heading in different directions.
Inspirations left me falling into something so liquid
Giving up the things I love
I’ve lost a part of me from there to here
Completing a circle I find myself where I once was before.
Torn between him and a dream of you.
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