Forced Mutation

Fleeing to water taking in the air, a salty pungent smell. Street lamps barely light these pages as the sun bids good night to the moon. Loved ones collide and come together, yet here I sit alone.

City lights sparkle like stars before their time. Surrounded by beauty, greedily wanting more.

Turning a page, I learn to care less changing who I am as I carefully piece swatches of fabric together to embody my next act.

When truth means nothing, words unsaid are feelings left unacknowledged.

Now there's nothing

Balance Abandoned

Frustrated with life, wanting escape
But craving companionship

Try to gain control
But loosing strength

Being supportive
But not being heard

Disturbed Anger Saddens my Soul

Go to that place you won’t find me there
No escape from this, there’s no way out

Don’t ask me how I feel, you’ll get no answer out of me.
I suffer in silence with no one there.
I will not speak.

My hand reaches out, the worlds too busy without me.
I walk this tight rope road, with bloody stains marking my path.
It digs in, a raging pain that never leaves.

This pain won’t get into me, it won’t take control.
A wall that will not fall, even as pieces crumble away.

My perspective is missed, as again and again it gets dumped on me.

Where’s my angel, left me alone always
My wings damaged from giving too much

I can’t voice these frustrations that float about.
Interpretations take too many liberties without seeing true meaning.

I’d leave if I could, run from it all
These anchors hold me in place as I tug and pull trying to get free,
Running on this treadmill, too long

Sick with pain, it’s all buried in here
Coming up to hurt me more as I dig deeper to hide it all

It's lonely here, with only this ghost standing by my side,
shaking his head in disappointment
Not speaking at all

My strength is only here because I am as stubborn as can be
Don’t want to be alone with my thoughts I drowned them out with mind numbing routines, just to pass time

I’m hurt but I can’t tell you, you can’t hear me as I am.
So instead I vent to paper without judgment.

Obscure impression

I reach for you, but you’re not there
You have no face because I don’t know who you are

A figure of my desires not yet reality

Left here with no instructions
Lost on a path that cuts in all directions

Bumping along the ground is sharp and digs deep

Blood seeps out
Continue on

Path ahead
Don’t go back
Waiting
It will come with
Time

Deliberation

Dizzy with words
Flying by
Pressing against lips
But never liberated
Imprisoned between mind and heart

The bitch you all made of me

Pin it down
Contain it all
No drops plunge
No sounds made

Dig it up and burry it all
Holding your breath in shades of purple

Strength taken
Confidence gone
Here come the costumes
Frills and embellishments

Once was now

Looking back to press forward
Conjuring strength to manifest control
Taking it all back
Rewinding pitfalls, a firm grip with idealism

Pealing back layers,
To better discover
Once was true predicts the future